Tag Archives: Monday

Good Things This Morning

So today as been surprisingly awesome so far.  And I should mention that having a good day that starts first thing when I wake up is extraordinarily rare.  Usually I wake up late, have to take care of a hyper-active puppy whilst getting myself to look presentable before rushing out the door cursing with a granola bar in hand.

Today was a lovely exception and I thought I’d share just because there’s no one else is here besides the pup to brag to.

So for today I’ll mention some More Happiness .

Note: A couple of these things occurred last night. I usually don’t drink in the mornings, not heavily anyways.

Happiness is…

Weird, captivating dreams.

Two, perfectly fried over-easy eggs and perfectly toasted toast.

Bernard (my doggie) when he’s not being a whiner, beggar, or turd-burglar.

A white russian and intriguing romance flick with a good friend.

Friendly neighbors saying hello.

Gorey, cheesy horror movies.

My Honda when it’s NOT making painful noises.

Two surprise tickets to an AWESOME Halloween concert.

Plans for pumpkin carving.

Curtis Mayfield’s “Move On Up” while I apply mascara.

Good things happening in the morning.

Appreciation of those good things.

AND David Bowie, of course.

Dammit, I need to appreciate these good things more often.

This is how I usually feel in the morning

How I feel today.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I hope you’ve had a good morning too.  If it’s been a typical cruddy one, put on a record, read a poem, jump on the bed, or do all three! Have a good weekend folks.

 

 

 

 

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Happiness is…

Despite my previous post stating that I can’t search for happiness like I would a lost puppy, I thought I’d end this chilly night on a positive note and think of the things that do make me happy. Seeing as it’s a new day, I might as well try to be less of a grouch and appreciate the little things.  So here goes…

Happiness is…

A dog kiss on a terrible day

Sierra, a pit bull I fostered some time ago. She taught me so much about responsibility and unconditional love

A hot bowl of ramen with sriracha when I’m starving

A light drizzle of rain and a glass of red wine

A chocolate chip cookie from your best girl at midnight on your birthday

Photos of my smiling family

My family and I in New Delhi, India

Phone calls and wise words from the ones I love

A good hug when I need it most

My favorite song first thing in the morning

Sore feet after dancing all night at a concert

I eat so much Ramen it’s kind of gross. But still, I love it.

Getting letters in the mail

Spicy curries

The scratchiness and voluminous of a record

Being proud of my mother

Watching my father play guitar

Having a beer with my brother

and sometimes even,

Finding a hat that fits just right.

I suppose happiness comes in all shapes and sizes, and considering that several of these things happened this horrible Monday, I guess it was not so horrible after all.

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Finding joy

Today was a rough day. My dog woke me up after about four hours of sleep whining and attacking me.  After a urination and bite of food, he still insisted that I wake up and give him attention.  Thanks, Bernie.  And then the usual story follows, miss the bus, drive to school, cram for a test, yada yada yada.

I felt like I had a gloomy cloud hanging over my head.  I was worrying about my parents and the obstacles they’ve been facing, worrying about school, missing the a-hole ex-boyfriend and hating myself for it.  I was praying for something good to happen, some one or some thing to show up and save me.  Some reason to cheer up.  Needless to say, my Monday was shite. And nothing was going to make it better.

Late in the evening I began reading a new book though, entitled The One-Straw Revolution by Masanobu Fukuoka and a passage grabbed my grumpy attention.  In the introduction by Wendell Berry, he discusses happiness and joy in the context of agriculture, but then he quotes a poem that could apply to even to my meager life.

William Blake once said,

He who binds to himself a joy

Doth the winged life destroy;

But he who kisses the joy as it flies

Lives in eternity’s sunrise.

Sometimes I try so hard to obtain something, I work relentlessly for a job, a relationship, for happiness.  I can almost try too hard and become attached to the idea of such a thing, and I suffer for it.  When I try so hard for happiness, I cannot grasp it.  I must let go and allow nature, in a sense, take it’s course. This is when happiness is found.

Goose Creek Falls in McCall, ID

When I apply this to my life I feel a mix of emotions.  On one hand, I believe in ‘fake it til you make it’. The idea that if one projects happiness and strives to find the good and joy constantly than joy will return to him/her.  I have long felt this way.  That if I keep smiling even though my insides are aching or laugh even though I’d rather sigh, that eventually the happiness would find me.  I found however, that no matter how many happy, positive movies I watched, or no matter how much I sought answers and happiness, sometimes this wasn’t enough.

Perhaps William Blake is right, that one cannot force such a wonderful emotion has happiness, and instead must be patient and then truly appreciate it when it comes.

I believe that having a positive attitude can help one to be happy, but it is not the source.  Happiness does not come when called. It is not something to be possessed, it comes and goes like the tides, and cannot be held onto or captured.

When I’ve been down in the dumps and searching for some thing to pull me out, I am usually left forlorn and lonely.  There is no thing or person that can bring happiness. It finds me, it finds you, when we detach and let the moments, things, and people come and go.

I have often hoped that a friend or lover would come along and save me.  Some sort of wonderful soul that could be my bright light, could teach me how to be happy.  How incorrect am I. While a good friend or significant other may bring good times, true happiness is found within, and like the wind it comes unexpected, and without a mechanism.

So perhaps instead of trying to fill a void, instead of trying to force something so fluid and ungraspable, I should allow myself to feel low, look inwards, and patiently observe the world and my inner workings.  When I have grown, the happiness will come.  I must appreciate happiness and bask in it while it lasts, for as we all know, life has a good way of throwing curve-balls.

Kiss the joy as it flies, and kiss my sadness as well.  Everything is constantly changing and I must let these emotions wash over me like the water of a bath.

Naturally, I could use a dose of my own medicine. It is a constant challenge .  The last thing I want to hear when I’m having a bad day is the whole “this too shall pass” spiel, but sometimes it helps to write it down and remind myself that all will be well.

McCall, ID

Photo credit given to my wonderful mother, Laura B. Pramuk

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